Have you ever asked someone to tell you their life story? More often than not, you will likely be met with a confused response: “Me? Why me? I haven’t done anything interesting or exciting.”

Most people downplay their adventures and accomplishments, not out of modesty, but because they view their lives as unremarkable.

Who would want to read about endless days filled by the familiarity of routine? We all have similar bylines in our personal biography: school, jobs, family obligations, the occasional vacation, love and loss, seemingly not memorable enough to warrant an Oscar-worthy screenplay.

But, when you dig past the daily grind, nothing could be further than the truth: hidden between the lines of your daily planner lies a remarkable origin story, that when viewed from another perspective, may look extraordinary.

Barb Cousens has lived at United for almost a year now, and to say it’s been a whirlwind is a bit of an understatement: in the past year she has become one of the most active and visible residents of the community. Along with becoming a regular program participant and social connector in the dining room, Barb got straight to work: joining resident council, starting a poetry reading group (aptly named the Live Poets Society), and representing United as a spokesperson during the finale event of Calgary’s 2024 THIRD ACTion Film Festival.

For many, that might seem like a lot. For Barb, not so much. To those close to her, taking centre stage is just part of riding the wave.

Pond(ering) life

“When I was growing up, my parents owned a store in Cut Knife, Saskatchewan,” Barb begins. “We knew everyone in town, so when we moved to Edmonton, and then Victoria to set up shop, I felt like a little fish in a big pond. As I grew up, I realized I didn’t want to be invisible. I didn’t want to be stuck. When I finished high school, I set out to make my own way.”

“The options for post-secondary for women at the time were limited to nursing, social work, home economics, and teaching,” Barb says. “Hells bells! It was frustrating my options were limited simply because I’m female. I love politics. I was on student council. I really wanted to be a lawyer, and I saw myself in a leadership role. I decided to major in home economics sciences at UBC because it offered opportunities to branch out.”

And branch out she did.

After completing her first year of University, Barb found herself working a summer retail position at the Banff Springs Hotel in the Wilson’s Woolen shop. “I met a lot of really interesting people — we lived together in the worker’s quarters, connected to the hotel by an underground tunnel, and we worked hard. But we had so much fun too. There was a record player in a room off the tunnel where we would dance the night away. I loved the Everly Brothers!” Barb continues, “At the end of the summer at the hotel, the manager announced I was the top seller across all CP Hotels in the region, and he offered me a secondary role as assistant in the shop. I suppose he thought I’d be honoured to receive the promotion, but it was in title only: no raise, no opportunity to move up. It took all of my courage, but I squared up and said: “With all due respect, sir, honour won’t pay for my tuition.”

“I left the Banff Springs to return to UBC for my second year. And that’s when I signed up for the Royal Canadian Air Force.”

Uncharted waters

Initially, Barb didn’t’ even tell her mother she had signed up. As part of her studies at UBC, she became a part of the RCAF—University Reserve Training Plan. With the training plan, Barb would spend three summers on base and three winters studying to earn her degree. Through the summers, she and six other home economics majors from across Canada made up the RCAF food services division as cooks at the school of food services. Here they prepared meals for the officers who were deployed to Canada for training.

“The RCAF really left an imprint on me. I met a lot of really interesting people from all over the world. We were all young, we spent time on the beach, dancing at parties. But it wasn’t all fun and pool parties,” Barb cautions. “We worked hard. But not everyone welcomed women into the RCAF. I hated wearing my uniform sometimes, because as women, we weren’t respected off base.” Barb continues, “Still, I’m glad I did it. We tried new things, and despite the challenges of the time, we made an impact. Someone had to be the first to do it.”

Barb met her husband Bill over a game of bowling while living in the army huts at UBC, whom she married after graduating. “Our courtship was mostly established through letters while I was finishing university. We were married in Victoria, and moved to Vancouver shortly afterwards. I landed an internship at Vancouver General Hospital as a Dietician,” Barb recalls, “but I had to ask permission from the director to keep working after getting married!”

Moving on up(stream)

“We moved around with Bill’s work over the years, and ultimately, I often found work as a contract teacher, which I truly loved. I taught a little bit of everything: home economics, phys ed, special education, you name it. I enjoyed the connection with the students, I found myself teaching Grade 12 English to a group of students who were, let’s say, less than enthusiastic,” Barb says. “Together, we would read a book like One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest and watch the movie afterwards to discuss the differences. It was a relatable way to discover a passion for reading.”

“Our social life was curling. It’s how, as outsiders, you make your way into an Alberta town. I was spending time with my growing family of three girls and making connections in the community, wherever we were. We made friends on the sidelines of curling bonspiels, we volunteered, and made the most of the communities we were a part of,” Barb laughs, “I can’t help myself. I like to jump in headfirst.”

Outbound perspectives

Over time, Barb’s career took her back to her roots, so to speak. She found herself in Calgary as head of the Clothing Construction Department at SAIT, using her tailoring skills to teach, and sewing wedding dresses for friends and family. “I do love sewing,” Barb says, “And I really enjoyed teaching in the post-secondary space. But the highlight of my tenure at SAIT was being involved with SAIT’s partnership program with the Canadian International Development Agency. I was sent to Russia along with a contingency of teachers who were tasked with teaching Russian students English. It was the adventure of a lifetime! It was truly a transformative experience. My own personal Mount Everest!”

While in Calgary, Barb also got involved with the Alberta Home Economics Association in Calgary, first as a long-time member and then moving up the ranks to President. “I helped reorganize their internal structure and sought opportunities to connect with international chapters and like-minded organizations,” Barb says. “Not everything I did was successful. I proposed a motion to host the 1994 International Home Economics Conference in Calgary, but we lost to Brazil. It was heartbreaking.”

Barb had plenty of opportunities for public speaking as well. “During my tenure as President, I was invited to be the keynote speaker at the 1989 American Home Economics Associations’ conference in Alaska. The theme was “Circumpolar: The Home Economic Perspective—I pulled an all-nighter and worked furiously on the plane to complete my presentation!”

If you can believe it, Barb and Bill found time to traverse across North America several times with their kids. The couple continued their travels later on, crossing oceans to explore Europe, and adventuring in far-flung outposts like Guam, Hong Kong, and Okinawa, opting to lodge with family, rather than hotels. “It was a great opportunity to see how people across the globe live.” Though not all of their travels were purely for learning. Bill and Barb love cruising, and soaking up the sun in Mexico. Their kids, it turns out, are now just as adventurous as their parents, thanks to an early introduction to world travel.

Unlikely confluences

Considering the sheer number of miles racked up over land, sea, and air, it seems improbable that our wayfaring preceptor found her way to United.

But just because you’ve set down the compass and star charts doesn’t mean your journey ends: “We love United because there are opportunities to keep learning, and to get involved. The variety of programming and the freedom to be ourselves is what clinched it for us. There are a lot of wonderful people here, who are just as passionate about lifelong learning, volunteering, and sharing as we are­. We love being a part of a community.”

And since all streams eventually find a confluence, imagine Barb’s surprise when she discovered a former colleague from Russia dining one table over at United. “I was completely shocked, what are the chances? It truly is a small world!” Barb laughs.

If you’re looking to chart a new course post-retirement, be sure to make United a port of call: perhaps Barb can even show you the ropes.